Sunday, 16 August 2015


In between wondering what to get for supper and trying to get my mind over a fling thing, I remembered a tweet. "She wants cold water, you fan the cup a million times, then someone else walks over with ice."

It only occurred to me, only a long time after, it was never about effort. It was what fits the bill best. Attribute it to my inexperience, or my overtly patriotic mindset. I believed that if you put in just enough effort, you might at least get to reap some of the benefits. Except, when it comes to the matters of heartstrings, it isn't all just facts and figures. 

I could, and probably did, put my best face forward, put on what I thought would be apt, enough to impress and hope to leave one wanting more. But the bill didn't fit. It wasn't at all my inability to churn out a decent look, neither was it anyone's fault. But through the everyday anecdotes and subtle nuances, I had another epiphany. While I still have many things to work on, maybe I have to slow down wondering why was I not good enough, or what was it I should have done. It wasn't neither of our faults. But it took me long enough to realise, and long enough of your time, that hey, you just weren't that into me. 

That was it. 

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