One thing that is more obvious than ever recently, is the fact that I haven't been able to keep up with time as well as I should, and this is taking its toll. Is it a result of over-stressing? That undying need to get a good grade, pressuring me so badly I can't even turn my brain off loud thoughts and stressors that is in my head. Like recently, I'm having less than 4 hours of sleep a day, because I simply can't get to sleep. And today, I only had 3. When I entered class, my brain was dead, I hear words, but it doesn't make sense to me. Even when my classmate asked me about some simple english question, I hear only words, but don't understand it. It's like I'm going crazy.
My fear of dark and its paranoia is getting out of hand. Whenever I turn off the lights, this scared feeling kicks in, and the weirdest thoughts come into my head. One thing I can hope, is that it doesn't happen to only me. The more I don't want to think about something, the more my brain wants to drill on it. It scares me, because I don't want to open my eyes and see things I don't want to.
I just need a good night's sleep, and get my body clock back to normal, and god bless that'll work.
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