Got A Little of Life Figured Out

After having conversations with different people and observations as well, accompanied by silent rides home. I think I finally understood, or at least a little, on what place I'm in right now in my life. Even though it's a little young at 19, but right now, I'm at a place in my life where there's just so many more things to consider and do than to constantly go through petty little things like conflicts and drama.

I'm at a place in my life where you're either a friend, or not. Not a foe, not an enemy, you're just a friend, or not. And if you choose to my friend, it means that you have to support everything that I do, be genuinely happy for my successes, and be awfully real to me when I need the truth. 

Seems like a lot of work, but the benefit is that you get all of that in return. 

I'm at a place in my life where I think it's dumb to listen to what people have to say on my business with whoever. Coming into poly, I learned how we can mistake classmate-ship(if that's a word) as friendship. People who could care less would suddenly be all up in your business because they like to start a ticky-ticky-boom and watch, insinuate things for their own entertainment, and let it unfold again and again. It's funny/peculiar/interesting/scary that after all that, they smile at you, laugh with you, talk to you. 

I would know best right?

I'm just at a place where I really couldn't care less to argue and be negative with people who just are trying to start fire. It's not that I can't hold a grown conversation, it's just that I've reached a place in my life to know that it's a waste of everyone's time. I'm at a place where you're a friend, or not. 

I'm not complaining, I'm just at a place in my life where I've learnt to place my focus on things that is actually worth a dime. 

I love you More than yesterday, but always lesser than tomorrow

The Undeniable 'X' in Life

Awhile ago, I was just caught in my own bubble of thoughts, and then I wondered, isn't it sad, that some people that appeared in your life just happens to be an 'X'. Not that they are a mistake or error, but do you see how tragic X relationships are.

2 people walking in separate directions in life suddenly cross path for that one point in time, no matter how long or short that path is, there comes a time where these 2 people have to carry on their baggages and responsibilities, only to never meet again.

It's scary I think, that person could be an acquaintance, a friend, a lover, or simply just a stranger. But the more the person meant, the crazier it gets. From someone you share the deepest secrets with, talking about the future like we knew shit. Feeling like a day without each other is equitable to having no air, then suddenly, to someone you didn't understand, or really know, and then there comes that one moment where you don't know anymore.

Flatlined, blanked out, suddenly you're source of happiness becomes your sole source of unhappiness, spending hours on why you're feeling like that. You love them, but you hate them, and then you're pretty much just screwed all around.

Some people are just 'X's entwined with this nonsense called life. For some, it's easy to let them pass/ As for the select few, you I just pray that different paths leads to the same destination, eventually.

I hope, I pray, I continue.